My sister in law is a Vet and she's the very first reason why I had the chance to have my own dog. My first 3 dogs were all Duchshand. And I have a funny way of naming them. The mother Duchshand is 'PENGUIN' and the father is "ELEPHANT". Then I named their puppies as "GIANT" and "ALADAR". Giant is the smallest one :-). Then my bestfriend gave me a Japanese Spitz on my birthday whom I named "CRUNCHY". I called her crunchy because her fur never really gets that soft as compared to other spitz no matter what shampoo and conditioner I use. Along the side I also have 4 local dogs whom I love dearly. The last dog that I ever had was "BORIS". He is a Great Dane, the largest of all the dogs that I ever have.
I must agree that Boris got a different attention from me because I never cut loose of him after he bit a child and cost me some amount for the kids vaccination and all that stuff. I put him on a modified and customized cage because of his size and I really made it a point that he won't feel that he's in a cage. The cage was so spacious that I even allowed 2-3 of my other dogs to play with him at times. Among all, I must say that an intrigue attention was driven to Boris because of my guilt that he has been caged throughout his life. Whenever I am home and have the time he is the center of my attention. I love him so much. I have so much fun with this dog and he made me feel that I am so protected whenever I am with him.
As forced by my work, I needed to settle to a different house all week days and just go home over the week ends. That was the time when Boris got sick and stopped eating. He eats when I am around but tend to ignore his food and didn't even drink once I am away. That routine persisted for 2 more weeks till I have decided to bring him to my sister in law who could provide absolute care while I am figuring things with my work. And when I finally decided to go back home and filed my resignation, it was too late. He's gone. From then on I gave all of my dogs away with nothing left for me and promised myself that I will never have another dog in my life again.
I still have that guilt. As if I let someone died in my own hands and didn't do anything to save him.
It was hard for me when my dog died. I cried a lot and it made me hard to sleep in the night. Especially if you love your dog so much. I miss my beloved dog. 🙁
It is never easy dealing with the lost. I already lost 5 but the pain is always unbearable. I wish to never experience it again but that is just how life is. I still cry until now everytime I remember them. The first dog that I got died 10 years ago but the pain is still here and I still miss him. I also lost a dog last january... And it pains me since just a couple of months before that (october) I lost a dog as well. I've experienced almost 48 hrs without sleeping just to take care of them when they were sick and dying, and I don't mind those sleepless nights for as long as I am with them. (Gosh. I'm actually crying while writing this) But no matter how painful it is, it didn't stop me to keep loving and caring for the other dogs that still with me. In fact I learn to value my time with them.
My dog is practically like a human. In that case, the loss would be horrible, but I know it will happen soon because he is so old. Anyway, it would probably come unexpected, much as human deaths often do.
Awwm, man. Dexter is my first dog, so I can't relate. I know how gutted I am going to be though. My condolences.